Reunited after 5 years, April 2022. Photo by Anna Lara.

It was in June 1996 that my father, my mother (pregnant with my brother), my sister & I migrated from The Philippines. May marks Asian Heritage Month in Canada, whilst June marks Filipino Heritage Month and Philippine Independence Day (June 12th). With that, I wanted to share my own family’s story, and the story of how we came to be two-time migrants. Huge thanks to my parents, who I interviewed for this, and took the time to answer my very many questions in great depth over email.

I am still in awe of how my parents moved us to a Western country they had never so much as visited before, on a massive leap of faith. We had little to no support system; they did not have any jobs waiting for them on the other side, and the Internet didn’t exist back then. They were motivated by the desire to give their children a life of opportunity and abundance, and I will never forget their struggles and sacrifices to get us here. I credit the life I have today, and the very many privileges I have enjoyed, to them.

Naturally, my early experience as a migrant heavily informs who I have grown to be as a person today. Like many first-generation migrants or children of migrants, I will feel forever caught in-between cultures—feeling neither Filipina nor Australian, an alien in both worlds. I may have grown up in the Western world, but my upbringing and my home life was still very quintessentially Asian.

I am the eldest of my siblings, and therefore the one who has the longest recollection of what life was like before and during migration. Those were arguably the most stressful years of our life, with my parents working all sorts of odd jobs to keep us afloat. Their grit and determination to make it work despite the odds will forever remain extraordinary to me.

Before I begin, I need to tell you why sharing this story is so important to me. Throughout my life, I have noticed how the words migrant and Asian are spoken, by our governments, by our peers, and by total strangers. More often than not, it is said with disapproval, almost as if it is a dirty word (despite the fact that Australia was colonised by—you guessed it—European migrants). What they really mean is that those of us with melanin in our skin should not belong.

Growing up being only mildly aware that I was not entirely welcome in a place I was supposed to call home often left me deeply confused about my cultural identity. I understand all this far better now; I understand that the privileges I have been given in my life are thanks in no small part to my successful assimilation into a society that tries over and over again to make us outsiders.

It was two years ago that George Floyd was killed and the Black Lives Matter movement sparked major conversations and change around the world. Since then, I have looked so much deeper into my own feelings; into events in my past that were clearly discriminatory (which I denied at the time); into the ways in which even Pinoy culture rejects blackness (from skin-bleaching creams to chemically straightening our unruly, wild, curly black hair).

This post is a way of reconnecting to my roots; of celebrating my family and our origin story; and of proudly owning my title as an immigrant, after years of this being a dirty word in many people's minds. We are honoured that you are taking time to read our story.

My parents were born in Naga City, Bicol, The Philippines. As with many families in the area, my mother & father’s families already knew each other. My mother is the 2nd of 8 children, and my father is the 8th of 10 children. Both families have Chinese, Spanish and Filipino heritage.

Q: How did our families come together? How did you and Dad meet?

A: “Dad and I met in high school, through friends. We were batch mates, but he went to Ateneo de Naga, an all boys’ school; while I went to Colegio de Santa Isabel, an all girls’ school. It was during one of the social activities organised between Ateneo and Colegio that I met two of Dad’s friends who, along with Dad, later became frequent visitors to our house in Naga City. When I went to college (that’s what we called uni) at UP Los Baños, Dad occasionally came to see me at my dorm whenever he spent the weekend with Tito (translation: uncle) Mon, who were then living and working in Los Baños. But it wasn’t until after I had finished uni and had started working in Legazpi City that Dad and I started dating.

Like many others in the Philippines, both Dad and I come from big, close-knit families so it was not surprising that we both shared the same family-centred values. We both understood that while our careers are important, our primary focus was raising a family. We both wanted to give our children a good education, preferably in private, exclusive (all girls or all boys) schools. We also wanted our kids to have a close relationship with each other, similar to how we were raised.”

My parents got married in January 1989, after my father returned from working as a Civil Engineer in Saudi Arabia. They had me in 1990; my sister, Celine in 1993; and my brother Carl, who was born in Auckland, New Zealand, in 1996.

Our family enjoying our first autumn in New Zealand, 1997.

On migration

Q: When and how did you make the decision to migrate?

A: “Dad had always dreamed about living in another country. And he felt this more strongly when we started to have a family. His experience living and working in Saudi Arabia definitely strengthened his resolve to move overseas. He wanted to give his family the comforts and opportunities available to those living overseas. I did not have the same resolve as Dad, mainly out of fear of the unknown, but I was happy to go along with whatever he wanted for our life. My trip to Germany opened my eyes to what life is like in another country. So when Dad broached the subject about migrating overseas, it did not take a lot of convincing for me to get behind him on this project.

When we decided to apply for permanent residence in New Zealand, Dad was working as a Civil Engineer for a Japanese consulting firm. He also had other engineering projects on the side. I was then a Senior Economic Development Specialist at the National Economic Development Authority (NEDA). So you can say that both Dad and I were on a stable career path with reasonable opportunities for advancement in our respective fields at that time. However, like many Filipinos, we dreamed of a better life for our kids, especially. To someone who had experienced first world comforts, living standards in the Philippines left plenty to be desired.”

“Unless you belonged to the wealthy upper 10% of the population, or were earning well above the average household income, working towards a comfortable lifestyle was a struggle. For many, buying or building their own home remains a dream for a very long time. The cost of private education was exorbitant. We had to purchase your elementary, high school and college education plans when you and Celine were just toddlers (with the expectation that these plans would pay for your tuition fees in any of the exclusive schools you end up enrolling in later; but plans such as these went bankrupt years later, just before you and Celine would have needed to use it had we stayed in the Philippines). Affordability of other things such as home appliances, electronics, vehicles, etc. was often beyond reach by the average income earner. Traffic congestion and pollution was an everyday reality. Travel overseas was an impossible dream for most.

Shortly after you (Camille) were born, we submitted an expression of interest to the Canadian Embassy, however, we didn’t meet the migration eligibility requirements at that time. A few years later, when Celine was about 2 years old, we heard that Tita (translation: aunt) Tessa (one of my father’s sisters) was applying for migration to New Zealand. We got all the details from her and found out that she prepared her application with the help of the Filipino community in Auckland. I was very surprised when I discovered that her main contact person was someone I knew from my uni days, your Tito Edwin. Anyway, I then emailed Tito Edwin and asked him about the migration application procedures. He sent us the forms with detailed instructions, and when we had all the documents ready, lodged the application at the NZ embassy in Manila. Our application was approved within 6 months and we had 6 months to then pack up our life and move to New Zealand.”

Q: What was the process like in The Philippines? Did the government make it easy/hard to get out?

A: “The Philippine government supported Filipinos going overseas for work so they did not really make it hard for people to leave the country. The only difficult thing we had to do was collecting all the documents we needed. We needed the originals or notarised copies of our University transcripts, Diplomas from the Department of Education; original birth certificates of each one of us from the National Statistics Office, NBI clearances for me and Dad, passports for everyone, medical examinations, vaccinations. Nothing was done online and there was no email back then. So Dad had to physically go to each of these government agencies to apply for the documents and collect them when they’re ready. You needed one day for each government agency because they were all in different parts of the city and traffic made it impossible to move quickly from one end of the city to the other.”

Q: How did you tell our families? What did they think?

A: “They knew we were applying for migration but I guess it didn’t really sink in until we got the approval. It was approved so quickly and I felt like we were given very little time to prepare. I was the first one in the family to leave the Philippines and I remember everyone feeling sad at the thought that at the next Christmas gathering, the family would no longer be complete. In the months leading up to our departure date, Dad and I agreed that we’d spend one month each at the Santiago and Casin family homes. We had a Santiago despedida (translation: farewell) at Lola (translation: grandmother) Basing’s* house in Camaligan, then a Casin despedida at Tita Julie’s house in Los Baños. I think all of the Casins* went with us to the airport. I cried so much when it was time to go. All I could think of then was that I don’t know when I’ll be seeing everyone again.”

*Lola Basing is my late paternal grandmother; the Casins are my mother’s side of the family.

Q: What were some of the most common questions or comments you got, negative or positive?

A: “Most of the questions I got were from friends and work colleagues. They wanted to know how we applied, did we know anyone in New Zealand, did we have jobs waiting for us there, did we know where we’re living. A few were quite worried when I told them we knew one family in Auckland, and that’s about it. Someone implied we were being too brave (read: reckless) to just rush headlong into the unknown with little kids in tow and another one on the way. But rush headlong we did.”

Myself, my mother, my brother and my sister sightseeing in New Zealand, 1999.

Moving to New Zealand

Q: In New zealand, what Did you and Dad do for work? what were the biggest challenges, and what were the most fulfilling moments?

A: “We left Manila at the peak of summer, and arrived in Auckland on the first day of winter, 1st of June 1996. We probably did not plan that very well because acclimatising to the New Zealand winter is not something you can rush when you’re coming from a hot and humid country.

Looking for a rental unit took longer than we expected because nobody wanted to rent units out to an unemployed couple with 2 little kids and another one on the way. In the end, we had to settle for a small, slightly rundown unit in Glenfield. The location turned out to be conveniently located since our first jobs were just walking distance from the house.

Tito Edwin and Tito Ruben and their families helped us settle into our new life in Auckland. They gave us plenty of helpful advice on pretty much everything: where to shop, what to buy, who can help with this or that. It was through them that we met other Filipino families, and many of them became like our extended families in Auckland.

Dad found his first job through Tito Noel, who was then working as a Finance Manager (I think) at a small company manufacturing and assembling bus parts. He worked in the assembly section. I remember him coming home one day feeling disheartened by the manual kind of job he had. But he had to keep going because he had a family to feed. He then worked a succession of odd jobs, working in McDonalds, as a night filler at Franklin’s grocery, as a console operator at a Caltex petrol station, and as a pizza delivery person at Eagle Boys. He usually worked two jobs at any one time, usually working night shifts, so he could take you to school and look after Celine (and Carl as well, after he was born) while I go to work during the day.

My siblings and I with our father, New Zealand, 1997.

“I found my first job through some of the Filipina friends we met during one of the many Filipino gatherings we had at that time. I was 4 months pregnant then and was only really looking for casual positions. When someone mentioned that Seasons was hiring, I applied and got the job. It was a garments factory and the job involved delinting and folding clothes for delivery. We all had to stand around this long table, in the middle of which were all the clothes we had to process. We worked 8 hours on our feet, with a timed 15-minute break for morning and afternoon tea, and 30 minutes for lunch. Remember that I was also pregnant at that time and had to stand all day except for the tea and lunch breaks. Sometimes, I also had to walk to and from work if Dad couldn’t drop me off or pick me up.

Most of the employees at Seasons were also new migrants from the Philippines, and we all shared similar stories. Most of them, like myself, left good positions/careers in the Philippines. Most of us were professionals - there was a school principal, a dentist, a lawyer, a bank officer. Everyone who applied for migration through the points system had to have had a good education, relevant work experience and good English skills. It was not surprising at all that most of the Filipino migrants we met were graduates of prestigious universities, had established careers in the Philippines and came from middle-class or upper middle-class backgrounds. And yet there we all were, working odd jobs because it was hard to find professional positions that did not require local work experience. Many of us had to dumb down our CVs to find any kind of job because nobody wanted to hire people who were obviously over-qualified for the job.”

L-R: My father, myself feeding my newborn brother, and my sister.

“While working at Seasons, I was also still actively looking for other jobs elsewhere. I always looked forward to Wednesdays because that was when we get the Employment Section in the newspaper. We would always be looking for job vacancies and clip the ones we wanted to apply for. A couple of months after I started working at Seasons, I heard that Tita Edith got a job at the University of Auckland. When I saw an ad for a Secretary position at the University of Auckland, I decided to apply. I was very happy when I got called in for an interview. That was September and I was already 7 months pregnant at that time. I thought my chances of getting the job given my condition were low but I decided to go for the interview anyway, in case they would would like to hire me after I have had the baby. But I was very surprised when I found out that I got the job! The job was anything but glamorous, but it was a giant step up from Seasons. I worked as the secretary to the Registrar at the School of Biological Sciences. I mainly just did admin work for the Registrar, including taking minutes of meetings, preparing School handbooks, some accounts work and data entry. I was really thankful for the chance to work at the University, where the work atmosphere was stimulating, even if the job itself was not.

What I found most challenging was trying to stay focused (and awake!) for the whole day. When I returned to work after my maternity leave, Carl was only 2 months old. For me to be able to return to work, Dad had to take the night shift so he could take you and Celine to school and look after Carl during the day. Both Dad and I would be so exhausted because we were both sleep-deprived and stressed, trying to look after little kids and working full-time. There were many instances when Dad slept through his alarm clock and would then get a call from school because both you and Celine haven’t been picked up. I was also so sleep-deprived I would literally nod off while doing data entry. There were cases when I would discover serious data entry mistakes I didn’t realise I had made.”

Our citizenship ceremony, New Zealand, 1999.

“We got our New Zealand citizenship in 1999, and it was around this time that our friends in Auckland started leaving for Australia. We then learned that jobs were easier to find in Australia, salaries were higher, there are more government benefits, they had superannuation*, and it was much easier to get a home loan there than in New Zealand. When friends within our immediate circle started leaving, Dad decided to see Australia for himself—first, to check employment opportunities, look for schools and where to live. We decided on Brisbane, as Dad knew a couple of friends from his Unitec days who had already moved to Brisbane.

When Dad returned to Auckland, we immediately started packing up our life once again. It took us less than a month to pack most of our belongings, and sell anything we couldn’t bring with us. Then we had to say goodbye to our friends who had become like family to us. In the end, most of our NZ group migrated to Australia as well, although most of them chose to live in Melbourne and Sydney.”

*Superannuation: Australia’s term for retirement pension benefit funds. Employers contribute a percentage of your annual income towards their employees’ super, making a comfortable retirement accessible for most Australians.

My siblings and I enjoying the sand in Australia, early 2000s.

Moving to Australia

Q: What was it like settling in australia?

A: “When we arrived in Brisbane, we stayed at Tito Larry’s for a couple of weeks while we decided on a Catholic school for you and Lene, looked for a place to rent, buy a car etc. Settling down in Australia was far easier than it was when we first moved to Auckland. Maybe it was because we were not first-time migrants then, so we already had an idea of what to do and where to go to find the things and services we needed. But I guess it was harder for you, Mille, since you had to start in a new school in Year 5, at an age when peer groups would already have been established.

Looking for a job was harder than we expected though. It took me 6 months to find a permanent job at UQ. While Dad was looking for a job, he decided to enrol in an IT course at TAFE but had to discontinue his studies when Carl started getting distressed every time we had to drop him off at childcare. Dad ended up being a house-husband for a couple of years, so looked after the cooking and the school drop-offs. He eventually got offered a job as Civil Engineer in Mackay (a city an 11 hour drive north of Brisbane, or a 1.5 hour flight) in 2003, then moved to an engineering consulting firm in Brisbane the following year. In 2005, he bought our family’s petrol station business and operated it until 2008.”

“Our migration story is not unique. It is an echo of what many other families have to go through when they leave their home and learn to adapt to life in a foreign country. We experienced the euphoria of being in a new country, marvelling at the green-ness, cleanliness and orderliness; the excitement of discovering how cheap and affordable food and groceries are, or that you can find a park or playground every few hundred meters; the comfortable feeling of security from knowing that the government provides a safety net if we ever need it.

At the same time, there were numerous lows. We felt a deep sense of loss: of family and friends, of prestige accorded to our previous occupations, of everything we loved and are familiar with back home. Our first Christmas in New Zealand was probably the saddest we had experienced because we were used to having big and noisy Christmas family reunions, with lots of presents for everyone and from everyone.

We also experienced feelings of disappointment at being rejected for positions you know you are capable of doing given the chance; of humiliation at having to work menial jobs because you can’t find anything else. Inevitably, at some point or another, we faced some form of discrimination.

Was it all worth it? Absolutely. Dad and I feel that all our sacrifices have been rewarded many times over. There is no doubt that you three wouldn’t be enjoying the opportunities you have now had we stayed in the Philippines.

Do we have any regrets? Only that we did not talk to you in Tagalog more consistently while you were growing up!”